Nowadays there are so many different options. If you want to go for a cake it has to fit to your personality and to your whole wedding style. If you have a romantic vintage wedding why don’t you have a simple wedding cake decorated with the same flowers of you color scheme? I love it!
If this is still too classic for you, why don’t you go for cupcakes? You can go for a small cake on the top you still can “cut” with your new wife or husband for THAT picture we all want but if not all of your guests want to eat the cake in the same moment –cupcakes are patient. Leave them together with the midnight snack at the buffet- just take care that it is not too hot if you have the wedding outside.
Another different cake option would be the “Macaroon Tower”. This is a very light cake option which definitely can be eaten bit by bit also when the party goes on…
Talking about the perfect timing for the cake: most of “our” wedding couples cut the cake after the dinner before the first dance. But if you have the ceremony in the early afternoon and the reception is a dinner, some of the couples decide to have the cake after the wedding ceremony together with coffee and tea, it is also a possibility.
Just decide whatever fits best for you. And, if you are more a “spicy” couple, why not having a real “cheese” -cake?